her

when the silence is deafening, what do you do?
i hear typing.
the T.V in the background but it all seems so insignificant.

the lump in my throat is screaming to get out.

not being able to find the right words are choking me. my family.
trying to understand is more confusing.
the world is shaking.
the room is spinning.
our hearts are restless.
God is preparing us for something bigger. ....................

but... it feels like .....there is nothing bigger than this moment

time is so slow. was it meant to be this slow? right now?

Im so sorry. Im so so sorry.
im so sorry this is happening. that it ended this way.
my heart breaks for you. for her.
(for whom ever "her" is) there are so many different people that fit "her" in this situation.

to loose a child.
to loose a sister.
to loose someone who brought you into this world.
to loose.

i've not had to loose any of those things and couldn't fathom the pain, emptiness, desvastation that comes with loosing those things.

All I can do is cry for all the "hers".
my heart breaks for hers.